Monday, January 1, 2018

Move on.

I'm ready. 

I'm ready to let you go. I'm ready to bid a goodbye to my favorite parts of you, the special memories, the moments I wish I could rewind. I'm ready to let them go, I'm ready to loosen my grip and welcome new ones. I'm ready to let the moments I loved slip through my fingers and go make new ones. 

I learned.

I learned the lessons you were trying to teach me. I learned from the pain, from the heartbreak, from the betrayal, from the tears, from the mistakes and from my own shortcomings. I learned the hard ones; you were hard on me sometimes but I’m thankful for the lessons because I hope I’m a little bit wiser, a little bit stronger and a lot more resilient because of them.

I forgive you.
I forgive you for putting me through hard times, I forgive you for not making the good times last longer, for not turning things exactly the way I want them to and I mostly forgive you for all the lonely nights. In a way, they made me fearless, in a way, they taught me how to enjoy my own company and in a way, they made me unafraid of loneliness.

I love you.
I love you for all the blessings you gave me, for the times I spent smiling, for the all the times I laughed with my friends and the times I stayed up talking to someone I love. I love you for the moments when you made me feel invincible and for the moments you made me feel alive and for the ones that will live me with me forever. I love you for being so memorable, so unforgettable and so breathtaking.

I’ll miss you.
It’s strange, because you weren’t perfect but you still had a special place in my heart. Something about you was pivotal, something about you was comforting, something about you felt safe, like coming home after a long time, like I’m finally on the right track, in the right direction. Unlike all other years, you left an impact, you felt right.

2018 — I’m ready.
I don’t know what to expect, I don’t know what you hold for me, I don’t know if you’ll be better or worse, but I know I’m ready for you. I know that I can handle the bad moments and embrace the great moments. I know that I’m open to learning and appreciating why things won’t turn out the way I wish they could. I’m ready because I’m letting go of the past and willing to start over with you. 

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